Sunday, December 04, 2005

christmas chaos - pt 1.

momz drafted me for decorating duty, which is code for "you betta not have shit to do cuz you'll need the whole weekend to get all this shit done."

i got there around 4 p.m., pulling into the driveway right as she was leaving. she told me she was headed to the grocery store, which is code for "i'm headed to the liqour store, THEN to the grocery store". i watch her leave, go into the house, and am immediately verbally accosted by dad as he spent the next hour complaining to me about his job and the kids he works with.

i play the good daughter bit, although i'm thinking "i don't give a shit about your job or those fucking kids, dad." yeah, i was in one of those moods. all i gotta say is that my friend is in town and she's a bloody bitch.

aiight, so after he hijacked my ear for an hour, i paid him the ransom of a bottle of heineken and he walked off to sit in his favorite chair in front of the television. i pick up my knitting and get at it until my momz gets back from the grocery/liqour store.

when she gets back, we get to decorating. the first order of business was to decide which angel gets placed on top of the christmas tree this year.the angel is a big deal for momz. for years, we had a white angel in blackface placed on top of the tree because we couldn't find a black angel. now, not only do we have black angels, we've got black angels representing different classes.

here is our reigning angel. she has been on top of the tree for at least ten years. judging from the expression on her face, she's tired of the gig and is ready to move on to bigger and better things. i'm sure she's exhausted after having held her baby for at least that long without any assistance from baby daddy angel. see, even in heaven, brothas leaving all the baby chores to the sistas.

she's willing to sit atop our tree, but that doesn't mean she has to be happy about it.

and then there's the recently purchased challenger to old angel's throne. i have dubbed her 'lil kim' cuz she's sporting the hat lined with chinchilla fur and a muff studded with diamonds. it's obvious she's nouveau riche, the hundred dollar bills in her prada bag so crisp she cuts herself whenever she pull a few out to pay for her next shoe purchase.

i'm not sure she'd be down with sitting on top our tree, though. we're only middle class and our tree isn't professionally done. her perfectly processed coif is unlike the hairstyle of every female in the immediate family, as both mom and i rock locs.

we finally decided to keep the pissed off angel. i take pleasure in her continued pain.