what to do?

my body is no longer familiar to me. i stare at my hands and wonder when they suddenly started looking older. when did my fingers first start twitching uncontrollably? when did the skin on them become dry and unappealing? when did the bones within them become arthritic? i look at my hands and wonder what story they're silently trying to impart to me. are they whispering to me that my health needs to be addressed? is there something going on within my body that i'm overlooking?

i've been going in circles for years trying to figure out why my body appears to be disintergrating before my eyes. i wish i knew where to start trying to find answers.