recent thoughts to myself (and others...)

"this is a nice place, but it isn't THE place, nikki" - about two months ago after initially finding a spot i thought i wanted to move into. i wasn't totally crazy about the place, but it was only two miles from work and i hate commutes so i was down with it. there was something in me telling me i didn't need to get that place. maybe it was the previous owner who was just this side of shady...dude who had put a shitload of work into the spot but kept telling these little fibs that had me thinking he wouldn't do good business. but it was two miles away from my office, dude!

"sigh..." - after dude told yet one more fib about supposedly telling me he was supposed to meet me at the house at 6 p.m. when i know i told that mofo 5 p.m. i guess he thought i would second-guess my own damn self instead of checking him on that shit.

"oh no you didn't playa..." - after dude emailed me talking about how i inconvenienced his ass by telling him i wanted my money back before he ran the credit check. it was obvious he used to be a teacher cuz he tried to lay that guilt shit on me, making it seem like it was my own inadequacies that contributed to the deal going sour. then i proceeded to email him back and tell him that it was his shady behavior that did it and he needed to check his shit before he tried to do business with someone else. i told him i'm not one of his fucking students. oh...and send me my fucking money or you getting sued...

"smart move playa" - after i got my check in the mail.

"you're an idiot" - 1.5 months ago as i looked in the mirror and realized i had to start searching all over again.

"YEAH BABY!" - the same day i told myself i was an idiot, after finding THE spot...a nice brownstone in grant park. see, THIS is why one should listen to his or her instincts...

"who has this much shit in 864 square feet of living space?!?" - two weeks ago when after telling everyone around me i didn't have alot of packing to do, i started packing and realized i had shit stuffed into every crack and crevice of that spot, kinda like crumbs tucked away into the folds of a fat chick.

"hold up...it was right HERE all this time?" - 1.5 weeks ago, when after telling de ex my digital camera had been stolen months ago he pulls it out of whatever black hole it was in and dropped it into my lap. when asked where he found it, he replied "underneath all that shit i told you to look under."

"i fucking HATE moving" - a week ago as i sat on my couch, looked around the living room, and realized that after damn near three weeks of packing i had only gotten maybe 50% of the total packing done.

"i ain't mad atcha." - last saturday as i sat in my car in a restaurant parking lot down the street from my new abode, staring at this loc'd up cat. brotha was nicely put together and walked with the swagger of the urban professional who walked to work alot.

"look at all these beautiful black folk!" - as i drove through my new neighborhood a week ago. i never knew how much i missed them until they were no longer around. buckhead had its perks and i got along with everybody no doubt, but it's cool to be able to see folk who look like me and do what i do. there are some things that folk from the same ethnic and/or cultural background just 'get' and shit, ain't nothing wrong with it.

"uh, i ain't taking this, this, those or that." - after i saw i still had a computer table, two lamps, a book case and a vcr to pack. gave the vcr to the folk upstairs and am taking the lamps and shelves to the 'rents so they can add to the pile of shit they'll end up not using. the computer table? who knows...

"how could i have possibly forgotten THOSE?!?" - how come even after friends helped me move my shit on saturday i still hadn't gotten all of it out?!? sunday evening i'm sitting at the old spot staring at food and spices, a deep fryer, microwave, and george foreman grill, all looking me in the face like "thought you could just leave us behind, huh heffa?"

"I FUCKING HATE MOVING!" - this past monday as i was back in my old apartment STILL getting shit together to take to the new spot.

"YOU are going to the homeless shelter." - said monday night to a bunch of clothes and canned goods.

"IT'S GOOD TO BE HOME!" - said last night when i got to the new spot after work, repeated this morning when i started this entry :)

happy valentine's day everybody!